Wednesday, June 27, 2007

The new me

First off, many of you will be pleased to know the mustache met its end earlier this week. The fun had kind of run out of it and, honestly, it was itching like poison ivy pants. I’m back to normal. Oh yeah, and it also dawned on me that I was in the competition with two married guys. One of whom’s wife was out of town. Yeah, like I was gonna win that one.

Now on to more important matters.

Many of you thought I moved to Los Angeles for a job. Others thought it was for a girl. Turns out, you’re both wrong. Truth is, I moved here to play piano.

Poorly.

And I’ve got a new MySpace page to prove it:

Piano Mystique

Gone are the jeans, the flip flops and the t-shirts. From here on out it’s gonna be white suits and even whiter teeth. And hair gel. And highlights.

I guess this spring I’d just been looking around for some way to make a difference or a way to make the world a better place. LA’s a very progressive city, you know. And I thought to myself “what the world really needs is more straight up crap piano.” Especially now that Tesh is out of the new-age piano game.

So I bought a ridiculous white piano and I started out playing pretty decently. But thankfully I soon got bad. Real bad.

Next thing I knew I was playing hackneyed old movie scores and songs accompanied by a CD of the same crap played by the Cincinnati Symphony. I thought about getting the NY or the LA Philharmonics but then I thought “this is my dream, I’d better not screw this up.” Now I’m a multi-album selling piano player who looks like a woman and is totally gay! Yippee!

So look for me in Branson, you guys!

Toodles.

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